In which someone pays a bar tab with a personal check

I’m not sure how it started, but the first thing I remember is standing at fairly crowded bar with JV, trying to order a drink. There was a really obnoxious, condescending guy with us. I think he was trying to impress J by showing off his knowledge of adult beverages and everything about the way he was acting rubbed me the wrong way. I looked at the drink menu and ordered something that was comprised of some kind of fruit liquor and cream. J wanted something with a weird name like a “half-empty sugar lemon” and the obnoxious guy kept telling her they didn’t make it, sweetie. But then the bartender, who looked like Jackie from Roseanne, said that they did. She brought back our order and we had a Midori sour and the half-empty sugar lemon, which was served in a martini glass with blue frosted ice all over it and the name of the drink written into the ice. I started drinking that drink, even though it was J’s and I kind of knew I had ordered something else. The bartender asked me if there was anything wrong with my other drink and I saw the orange beverage in front of me. I tasted it and it tasted like an orange creamsicle. I said, “No, it’s fine, I’ll have both,” and J said it was OK because she would just make herself another one. For some reason she was behind the bar. I remember thinking the obnoxious guy was a pussy for ordering a Midori sour.

Then my friend A came up and handed me a check. I guess everyone at the bar was all part of one party and A was giving me money so I wouldn’t get stuck with the whole tab myself. She kept coming back and giving out more and more checks and I kept telling her she didn’t need to do that. There was some kind of ruckus at the other end of the bar so we went down to see what was going on. A woman was complaining and being difficult, but then one of the bartenders (a man) busted her for trying to write a bad check. Apparently she had paid her tab with one check, but then complained about the service and wanted to pay with another check, and this was an emerging scam in bars. Everyone was impressed with the bartender for figuring it out. Then it seemed like the Jackie bartender was also in on it, and they were both going to be arrested. J and I sat at the bar and MT was there too, and also Lt. Van Buren from Law & Order. Van Buren said that the women who were arrested were in for a long night, and we agreed.